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Dearest Get Free Fam,
Normal service has resumed and The Get Free Guide is back in your inbox on #getfreefriday. I tried a thing (or a couple of things), got sidetracked by a few things (it’s giving “deadlines”) and yea…nah. When you make a promise, as best as you can, you need to keep it, for others, but for yourself. The way I was all off kilter publishing Get Free … on a Sunday (albeit because of some technical issues)? To quote Black Panther’s M’Baku:
We will not have it at all!
So if you’re new here, welcome! Say hi and let me know where you’re from and how you’re trying to get free. Freedom isn’t just about the big checks, the fancy cars and lavish vacations. Getting free can mean more rest, more time with loved ones, a slow morning or the choice to tell your job “nah” because you don’t feel like working on a Tuesday. Getting free is daily work, it’s step by step, and we can do it! Whatever it is, we tackle it here and it’s great to have you!
If you missed it last week, be sure to download your FREE (did I say free?!) Get Free Health Guide! A big thanks to our friends over at AfroLA for compiling this resource! This includes some questions GFFs had about health and ways to understand the many numbers that face us when we go to the docs. Use the code GETFREE to download. And share!
Point of View = Power of Voice
This week we’re talking about calling things what they are and owning our point of view: we have power of voice. Let’s break it down.
Now that we’re six months or so into The Get Free Guide (can you believe that?) I’m seeing what’s working and what’s not; the topics the community gravitates towards and the others that are “thank you, not so much, try again next week.” I’m so grateful to each of you who spends even a few minutes here.
Here’s the thing, though: data and opinion can rule everything, if you let it. But - and this is a big but - you have to know what you stand for and what your point of view is. Having a POV is a part of life: if you’re raising kids, you have a POV on how you want to approach their care. In the workplace you have a POV on what you will and won’t tolerate (and you act accordingly.) Where money is concerned you likely have a POV on how conservative or aggressive you want to be with your dollars and cents (or pounds and pence - hey, UK peeps!) Without a point of view we’re blown in directions that - at best - make no sense for us, and at worst are flat out detrimental to our wellbeing.
So why ruminate on points of view?
Real talk, I’m struggling with talking about getting free and this concept of freedom when we are in a hellish news cycle. I worry about sounding tone deaf when there is so much loss, so much worry, so much fear (and I’m not just talking about in the US, there’s so much happening in countries around the world.) As a journalist at heart my antennae are forever tuned towards news and the need - in some way - to respond. But I got a reminder this week that helps:
Your point of view matters. Know why you started, cause no harm, and keep going.
The person wasn’t talking about this newsletter, but a philosophy for life. If we all just stop sharing our POV, how does anything change? There will always be something going on to offer pause - personally, professionally, on your doorstep or out in the world. But remember why you started.
For The Get Free Guide, it was conceived as a way to look inward and push goodness out; a counterweight to waves hands all the things we have no control over. But we can choose to be kind, to extend grace to ourselves, to celebrate wins, to watch bad TV, to throw out the bathroom scales, ditch all the unread emails - the list goes on. We are not helpless. And when our friends and family feel like they can’t do anything, we can be there with full cups to pour from.
So this is the space The Get Free Guide will remain: not a place that digests and responds to the news, but a once -a-week pause (or as many times as you need to re-read!) to be encouraged and reminded that you’re not doing life alone, that we’ve all got things to figure out and that it’s OK to laugh and seek joy, even when things feel heavy (my jokes are terrible, but feel free to send better ones!)
Quick note: every now and then you’ll see ads. Clicking links like the one below or at the top of the page (only the ones that interest you!) help me keep this newsletter and growing community free for everyone, and offer resources at low or no cost. Appreciate your support!
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What’s the Get Free practice for the week?
For you, what POV is feeling diluted?
Make time this week to really think about that and jot down why you might feel shaky in your POV (but remember, your POV shouldn’t cause harm.) Not having a POV can mean you’re not having your needs met, letting the loudest person in the room make decisions, or just struggling with the word, “no.”
Here are some ideas that can help as you consider your POV:
Having a point of view is a responsibility, not inflated ego, especially in the workplace. Having a point of view is adding to the collective knowledge base (that’s why we don’t gatekeep here.) Sharing a POV and wisdom can save others SO much time (always feel free to share - email [email protected])
Having a point of view doesn’t mean you have to defend it *
Your POV is yours for a reason. If someone doesn’t agree with it, it’s not a reason to fight. We can agree to disagree.
*But one caveat: if your POV is steeped in any of the isms, let’s rethink that, yes?
Practice sharing your POV in low stakes situations, like choosing a movie or restaurant
With someone you trust, say no to something you don’t want to do. You can practice saying: “I’m not up for that tonight. We can talk about it later.”
This is a tough one but let me know how you get on. You can email [email protected] or just hit reply to this message if it’s in your inbox!
Get Your Life: Things to read, listen to, enjoy🚀
📚What I’m reading: If you’re planning a trip this year, be sure to check out The U.S. Civil Rights Trail by Deborah D. Douglas. This is the updated second edition and is THE book to read/refer to if you’re learning about the people and places that are part of the history of the civil rights movement. Be sure to order from your local bookstore (my favorite is Octavia’s Bookshelf!)
🎧What’s on the pod: Therapy for Black Girls hosted by Dr. Joy Harden Bradford. This podcast has been going for years and has covered pretty much every topic you would ever need to hear. I dropped in last week and heard this one about understanding who you really are
🎵 Soundtrack for the week: River by Leon Bridges, just because.
✨ If you’ve got a recommendation drop me a line. ✨
I’m looking for real life stories of getting free to share in the newsletter. Got a tale of how you navigate freedom in the workplace? Perhaps you sold off your things and moved to another country? Or you figured out financial freedom? Email [email protected] and put “Get Free Story” in the subject line. I’ll be in touch soon!
If you got something out of this issue of The Get Free Guide, give us a follow or a shout out on Instagram and share the love with a friend. We don’t gatekeep around here!
See you next Friday!
